I’m very big on the idea of ensuring that the language I use serves me.
That means, almost always, staying polite. It also means staying positive, but that doesn’t mean ignoring problems. Rather, it means framing problems as tasks or opportunities, rather than simply facts about the universe. “Ugh, it’s going to rain,” is a problem statement. “I’m going to dress warmly and bring my umbrella when I go out today” frames it as a task that’s within my power to accomplish. Even better is something like “Oh, I get to wear my new rain jacket today!”
I’ll do these things even if no one is around to hear me. Language isn’t just about how we communicate with others. It’s also about how we shape our own thoughts. The words in your head are soft and squishy. They become much more firm when we say them, which is why voicing your fears – so severe and realistic in your head! – often makes you realize how silly they were.
So I use language as a thermometer. And in the same way you can’t change the temperature by forcing the numbers on a thermometer to change, you can’t force a mindset shift just by policing anyone’s language. But especially with yourself, what words you choose to use are an excellent indicator of your overall state of mind, and that’s worth paying attention to.
The Opportunity Machine 