Sometimes the act of searching for something and not finding it is more damaging to you than just not having it. Maybe you’re looking for a raise from a boss, an apology from a friend, affection from a partner, understanding from a parent. And maybe you just aren’t going to get it.
The best thing you can do is stop looking for it. Constant attempts to find what simply isn’t there will do more damage to you than a quick realization that you’re barking up the wrong tree, followed by a pivot to a new strategy for reaching your goals. You can’t make something be there by wanting it, but you sure can make yourself miserable.
Don’t allow the most important parts of your contentment to be dependent on the actions of others. Don’t drink that poison.
The Opportunity Machine 