If you punish someone for talking to you, they’ll do it less. “Punish” can mean a lot of things, but just remember – speaking to you is a choice, always.

People are generally quite prone to hyperbole and hysteria. You’re no exception, and neither is your brain; your memory, especially. If one bad thing happens to or near you, your brain will elaborate on it until it become an epidemic. Even if you only hear about a bad thing, your memory will make it worse, and more frequent, and more the cause of actual malice.

This is just a statistical bias in that direction, and it’s damned near universal. The good news? Statistically speaking, almost every bad thing you can think of isn’t actually as bad as you think.

Think about something you view as “bad” in the world. Take a moment to imagine (or pretend you’re “remembering”) the details, as many as you can. Then, take ten minutes and go do some actual research. You’ll find that almost universally, it’s not so bad.

The actual thing itself might be bad, of course – I’m not saying “kidnapping” isn’t as bad as you think. I’m saying it’s not as frequent as you think. If you say something like, “Kidnapping is rampant! It happens all the time, and people usually get away with it, and nobody cares,” then you’re just wrong. Kidnapping is bad, but it happens less frequently than you thought, people who do it get caught, and as for nobody caring? Well, if they didn’t hear about a kidnapping case today, then their brain didn’t do what yours did, which is blow it up into a whole thing without you even realizing. That’s why it seems like “nobody cares.”

Look, there’s bad stuff in the world. And you can (and should!) make an impact where you can. But if your own life is getting worse because of how bad you perceive the world to be, have hope. Both the world and your specific life are not so bad, after all.

No matter how tired you are, you get that boost of energy when the finish line is in sight. Somehow, you find the strength to run, a burst of speed beyond what you would have sworn your reserves possessed.

Bring the finish line closer, and get those boosts more often. Set milestones more frequently, and find the strength.

I think most people – myself included! – squander their good luck. As a result, we think we’re far less lucky than we are.

Imagine that you’re doing moderately well (and I hope you are). Your bills are paid, your health is fine, there’s nothing particularly pressing on your horizon. Suddenly, you get a small but unexpected windfall; maybe you win a raffle, or a gifted lottery ticket hits for a small amount, etc. You get something like a thousand bucks.

What do most people do with it? Probably something like whatever your first thought was: a nice dinner for your family, a small vacation for yourself, maybe a shiny new toy you’d like. After all, this is “free money,” so why not let yourself have a little fun with it? Assuming your savings rates and bills and such are already where they need to be, what harm does it do?

Well… no harm, really. But definitely a missed opportunity. Ask yourself a different question: What keeps you from investing a thousand dollars into the stock market right now? The answer is probably along the lines of “I don’t have a spare thousand bucks to fritter away learning how to invest without losing my shirt.” The upside of investing is, of course, enormous. Especially in comparison to the upside of a nice dinner or new toy. But when we suddenly do have that luck, we don’t come back to questions like this.

All I’m saying is: You should have fun. But “fun” should be a part of your plan to begin with! It should be budgeted and accounted for. A sudden windfall, of any kind, should perhaps instead be used to multiply itself. Reinvest your luck!

My middle child was drawing with one of her younger cousins, and the cousin was getting frustrated about making mistakes. My daughter said to her: “That’s okay. Mistakes are proof that you’re trying.”

What wisdom this child possesses!

Good reasoning and patience have a tendency to snowball. Teach those things early, and very, very quickly your children will become smarter than you could have dreamed. They’re already all much smarter than I am, a fact that brings me tremendous joy.

I’ve made plenty of mistakes while raising them, of course. But that just proves I’m trying.

‘Tis the season. You’re spending a lot of time with people – that’s good! Mostly.

Time with your loved ones is amazing; the beating heart of a good life. But don’t feel like you have to overdo it. The important thing is the time, not the window dressing. Make it less stressful for yourself. It doesn’t all have to be activities and dressing up. Even a phone call is nice.

Don’t try to do so much that you do nothing. Be alone when you need to (and we all do), but let the time you spend with others be a joy, not a chore.

Long quests are best done with an ally or three at your side. The longer the mission, the more likely it is that you’ll need their help. Not necessarily for the logistics, but because no one can walk forever without having doubts. Trials of the soul. A heart beating next to yours is the best remedy.

The boldness and cheer of my children. The life I am able to live. The joy of service when I can find it. The inescapable wonder of the world.

I am lucky beyond belief.

When a miracle happens, we often try to recreate it. We try to find a way to capture that magic, to turn it into a renewable resource. We create endless film spinoffs of successful single movies. We try to re-tell a joke, seeking the same laughs. We live in our glory days, never realizing we’re robbing of them of their glory.

But you can recreate magic – just not exactly the same magic. You have all the ingredients, because they were all you, all us. Embracing life, being creative and present, allowing the space for miracles; these are the ingredients for bottled lightning. It won’t be the same film, the same joke, the same glory. But it will be just as amazing, if not more, if you simply embrace the idea that it can be.