Spare Parts

Every aspect of your life can be stripped for parts to build some other aspect, if you need to. You’ll often do this inadvertently, but without direction it can be sloppy and destructive. You can get much better at it by doing it intentionally.

Imagine two of your friends, each in a relationship. The relationships aren’t working out, and both of your friends decide to end their relationships with their respective partners. One of them, let’s say Kim, ends their relationship maturely. Kim has a conversation, treats their now ex with respect, and quashes rumors among friends by being transparent (while still remaining respectful of their ex’s privacy, of course). They split up any mutual possessions and maintain friendships.

Now picture the other friend, Pat. Pat decides to make this into A Thing ™. Pat dumps the other person in a big blowup fight, trashes them publicly, creates divides among friends. Pat goes into hysterics at the mention of any of the places they used to go together and throws away or burns all the mutual possessions.

Kim has clearly done a better job salvaging the useful bits of that part of their life. Those bits can be turned into something else very easily! Lots of friends, a good network of communication, even some nice outfits that they’ve cultivated. They’re more ready to date again sooner, because they recycle well – not to mention just treating someone else more nicely.

Pat has to get all new stuff. A new “dating circle,” new places to eat and other date locations, etc.

This is everything in your life! When you leave a job, you want to make sure you’re keeping your network, your skills, your reputation, maybe even your stapler. When you move, you don’t just throw everything away and buy new stuff when you get there. (Note – it’s totally okay to SELL everything and buy new stuff, especially if it makes the move easier! But waste not, want not.)

Use your life efficiently. Some things are hard to build. Even if they reach a point where they no longer serve your goals and aspirations, you can – and should – use all that you can from what you’ve made.