Happenstance

Sherlock Holmes said: “When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”

Here’s a version of that to apply to your life: “When you have eliminated all which will not happen, then whatever remains, no matter how you feel about it, are the possibilities for the future.”

Want to make yourself really miserable all the time? Then expect things that won’t ever happen, and get mad when they don’t. Note that the question of whether something is likely to happen is totally separate from the question of whether it should happen (or whether or not you want it to). Don’t confuse them.

Your high school bully should call you, out of the blue, twenty years after graduation to apologize for the way they treated you and offer to make amends. But if you sit around mad that they aren’t, it’s because you were foolish enough to somehow confuse the question of whether or not they should with whether or not they will.

This is the source of, I’d say, maybe 90% of people’s unhappiness? If not more! Expecting something to happen just because it should happen. If you want contentment, learn to not expect things that aren’t going to happen. “Should” is a stupid question when you apply it to other people – if you decide that you should do something, you have the power to make it so. But the question of whether anyone else “should” do anything is purely academic and theoretical. Eliminate such thoughts, for they consume your time as well as your contentment.

Lots of things just happen, and lots of other things just don’t. You can’t control the storm that happens, but you can control how you stand against it.