It’s helpful to imagine myself on the opposite side of my own desk. I get stressed and frustrated and stuck, the same as anyone. A big part of my job is helping other people get un-stressed, un-frustrated, and un-stuck in exactly the same kinds of circumstances. So when that happens to me, I can run myself through my own process.
Because it is a process. There are systematic steps to take. Reflection, contextualization, research, planning, action.
- Reflection. Why am I stuck? What have I tried? What’s holding me back? Get answers, challenge them for honesty, get better answers.
- Contextualization. Where does this problem fit in the overall goal? Go big. Look at the whole picture. Is this even a real problem? Is the solution somewhere else on the map?
- Research. Okay, now I know where I am, where I want to be, and what’s in between. Time to look for solutions that have worked for others in the past, best practices, tips and tricks. The world is full of knowledge, and I don’t have to reinvent every wheel.
- Planning. Now I know what I need to do, more or less, to get to Point B. So I plan out the individual steps and get to work.
- Action. I do the steps, I iterate when things need adjusting, and I get where I need to go.
Walking other people through this process doesn’t even require that they know about it. It’s just a series of questions I ask, challenges I make, support I offer. Some part of it is getting people emotionally safe enough to see it, being a hype-man or a shoulder to lean on as the case warrants. When it’s me, I can cut through a lot of that.
(Tangent: I once reached out to a really great manager, who had helped me like this many times before, for help. He was very busy, but still took my call. When I explained my problem, he said: “You know me pretty well, you can probably guess all the things I’ll say here, right? So just pretend I said them and skip to the part where you feel better.” It was amazing, and it worked incredibly well as a way of empowering me to grow beyond needing him as a crutch. I’ll always be grateful for that moment, and I do that to myself frequently now.)
The only important thing is to remember that I have a process. When it’s me who’s stuck, it can be a tricky, hidden fact. But the process works; that’s why I use it.
The Opportunity Machine 